Always Looking for Cameras

I often find myself in situations that are often referred to as, "A Seinfeld Episode".  Other times I inquire, "Am I being Punk'd?" and "Are there TV cameras?".  Tonight I searched the rafters of Lindale Mall for television cameras. I couldn't decide if I was on "What Would You Do?", "Punk'd", or "Boiling Point". 

Let's back up. A few months ago I had the unfortunate experience of having one of my eyebrows waxed off.  I always feared this could happen, and sure enough, it did.  I have always thought about getting my eyebrows threaded.  I have walked by the kiosk a few times and wondered what the heck it was all about.  When I shared my eyebrow experience, a Facebook Friend highly recommended threading (you know who you are) and because I take her recommendations with high regards (this is how I ended up with a fabulous hair dresser), I decided tonight would be the night.

I strolled through the mall hoping that little kiosk still existed. I did not see it so I took a look at the directory and realized I had walked past it.  It was no longer a tiny kiosk, but a nice large area that looked like a mini salon!  I walked over to it and there I noticed a notebook. The notebook read (in very messy handwriting), "I will be back in 5 minutes". Below that were two phone numbers to call.  I immediately looked up into the rafters for cameras. I dawdled for quite some time pretending to be interested in whatever I could find on the counter and eventually gave up to browse the kitchen store nearby. After about 10 minutes I noticed another woman standing at the threading station and so I walked over.  She immediately pointed out the oddity and humor of the notebook and I knew it would be worth hanging around to wait.  She seemed like good people. After another 10 minutes she decided she was brave enough to call the top number listed.  Someone answered and when questioned how long it would be she said, "I will be right there. I am downstairs".  I said, "I hope she isn't wasted when she arrives. I might STILL end up with one eyebrow!" After 10 MORE minutes and us looking once again for cameras, the woman decided to call the OTHER number.  After a brief conversation she said, "I think that was the boss!".  I turned to her and said, "Great, now she is going to be wasted AND angry! We will for sure leave without any eyebrows!".  We decided this was our cue to leave. 

Although, I think my cue to leave was the notebook with a handwritten note.

Never Give Up

"But it is crooked!" This is what I heard through tears from the playroom.  Cooper likes to write down all of the dinosaurs that ever lived from A-Z onto his white board.  He does this over and over again. We have stacks of this kind of work completed on individual pieces of paper.  Papers we are forbidden to recycle, despite the fact there are nearly 50 of them. Cooper has caught wind of our slight frustration of having to do something with these pieces of paper, so he has decided to use the white board.  Good problem solving.

This morning Cooper wanted to write smaller. He also created a pattern with his markers to better organize his work.  What started to happen was, each time he wrote a dinosaur name, it started to trail into a downward curve. Each new name was increasingly worse.  Cooper erased his work twice to start over and I am certain his anxiety levels were intensifying with each "do over".  Soon the tears started, so I went into the room.  He said, "I am SO SO frustrated because my work is not straight and it keeps getting worse and worse! Pretty soon it will be a circle!".  I get it. I remember feeling that way and so I tried my best to help and encourage him.  I could have told him what an awesome job he was doing, but compliments do not help when you have a certain picture in your head as to what your project SHOULD look like.

I decided to use an index card to draw straight lines for him to write on.  Cooper was apprehensive because according to him, he should be able to do it the other way, but he tried it.  New tears were accompanied with, "now everytime I write a dinosaur name the side of my hand wipes away part of the lines below and when I fill them in, it doesn't look right!". This plan was not a success.  Meltdown.

"I am just having a really rough morning. I am SO SO frustrated!".  My response was, "maybe you should step away from this for a few moments, get something to eat, and try again later".  Yeah, that didn't work.  In the mind of someone with obsessive compulsive traits, the project is started and must be finished immediately.  I admitted to Cooper that although I remember feeling the way he was, I wasn't sure how to help him.  He said, "I have two options mom. To start ALL over again or just GIVE UP!".   I looked very seriously at him and said, "NEVER give up. That is not an option.  You can start over or find a different way to complete your task".

Cooper took a deep breath and said, "I think what I need is just some paper with lines". I suggested a notebook and thankfully found one.  He labeled the outside, "Cooper's Dinosaur Book" and proceeded to write all of the dinosaurs on earth from A-Z.  No more curved words, no more half erased lines, and no more pieces of paper floating around our house. Despite the drama. I think the morning was a success for now, and for his future.

It's Back....

That is all.

Sensory Overload

Today is a rest day as far as my half marathon training.  Rest days are fantastic not only because you don't have to worry about getting up before work to run or finding a time to run after work, but it feels well earned. It is an accomplishment.

Last night the first thing I had to do was run. Yes, it was part of the training plan, but it was for me to let the stress sweat away.  Starting a new job and all of the logistics that have to happen before you can actually work with kids is a little draining for me.  OK, very draining for me. SO, I run to release stress, yet I think about 8,000 things while doing so. By the way, 8,000 is the number I use for EVERYTHING when exaggerating. We have a bond.

Curious George is a favorite show in our house.  Cooper and Collin came downstairs to watch me run. What that really means is, turn up the TV to drown out the treadmill and run around like crazy taking out EVERY toy known to man. So here I am with my ipod playing loudly, the sound of the treadmill, Curious George as loud as possible, and children trying to talk to me as if I can hear every word they are saying. It is amazing how with all of that going on how clear the feeling of dying while running can seem.  I decided to add one more component to this situation and that was to watch Curious George. You see, Professor Wiseman was training for a marathon and Curious George was helping her. For some reason it was nice watching her struggle. It looked similar to how I was feeling at the time. During this time I was able to switch songs often on my ipod and when I found something I liked, really listened to the words and musicality.

All of a sudden with every step there was a SUPER bright light that flashed into my eyes. It started to make me feel like I was having a stroke. Was it happening? Was I going to be one of those people who DIES while running? Then I focused and saw Collin staring at the TV with his mouth hanging open and an LED flashlight drooping in his hand pointed right at me.  Of course I tried to shout at him, but that required breath I didn't have! I finally got his attention and he turned it off.

Soon Professor Wiseman was crossing the finish line and I realized I had hit the 3 mile mark so I hit stop and stood there looking like a sweaty mess.  How was it that through ALL of that sensory input was I still able to feel like my stress was washed away?! And I honestly felt great!  The human race is capable of processing so much more than we can even realize. 

The last thought that crossed my mind..."Is Professor Wiseman the girlfriend of the man with the yellow hat or not?!" They never really say!



Grandma K.

Two years ago today our family lost a very important person.  It all still seems so fresh in my mind and I am certain in the minds of the rest of the family.  This particular side of the family likes to make an entrance it seems. Matt has always made jokes such as, "Nice haircut. Will your family all get together to celebrate?"  When something happens with my mother's side of the family, whether big or what seems to be small to some, everyone does their best to be there. As with all families, there can be a lack of communication and disagreements, but always in the end we ALL come together.  This is why when I have a birthday party for the boys, the guest list is so large. It is how we work, whether people understand it or not.

This was no different during Grandma's last days.  I think our family took up an entire wing of the hospital.  Sometimes we were all there and sometimes we took shifts so SOMEONE was there by her side.  I think we all learned a lot about Grandma and each other during that time.  I never realized after all of these years her middle name was Leona. Some of us cousins talked about anything and everything from Ghost Hunters to the cost of braces these days, to what stood out about Grandma.  Stronger bonds between cousins and aunts were made as well.

When I would visit Grandma her first statement would be, "Get in here! I want to see what color your hair is THIS time!". Whether blonde or bright purple, she always complimented...never judged.  She always said, "to each their own". For someone of her age, she sure had an open-mind. She loved each and every one of us unconditionally.  I also remember staying at her house and her making me breakfast.  That is when I learned that a small amount of milk on my raisin spice or maple and brown sugar oatmeal was just what it needed.  To this day, I add a small amount of milk to the boys' oatmeal and they too love it.  These are just a couple of fond memories of a wonderful person.

She is always there. Her presence is made known in various ways.  To some this may sound crazy, but she leaves us dimes. We find them in the strangest places and during stressful times. Once I had one fly out of the washing machine at me.  This was after I was feeling overwhelmed with things at home.  I think, too, this was her way of saying, "take better care of your washing machine!". Grandma K. always cleaned her washing machine after each use!

That being said...WE MISS YOU GRANDMA K.!

Cooper and I holding Grandma's hand during her last hours

Collin holding her hand. At that time the youngest family member had connected with the oldest family member one last time.



A New Marriage

When I was pregnant with Collin, we had to take a Baptism II class.  Admittedly, Matt and I were kind of grumpy. WHY would we need to sit through ANOTHER Baptism class?! We already did it once and there isn't much to it! We trudged in and sat down. There was quite a large group of participants. Much larger than the class we took before we had Cooper. The leaders sat down and said, "this class is to help you prepare for how much your life is going to change when you add ANOTHER child to the mix". We had to talk to our spouses about how we were raised as children, how it was the same and how it was different.  We talked about what we wanted to pass on as parents and what we didn't. We were also challenged to evaluate how we already parented the children we have and what we may or may not do differently.

I think the BEST thing we walked away from was this was, "everything we do as a couple is a new marriage".  We had never thought of that before the class. Buying a new house...a new marriage.  Do we buy a car or do we NOT buy a car...a new marriage. Deciding on discipline techniques...a new marriage. Finances...a constant new marriage. Picking out furniture...a new marriage. Painting our home...a new marriage. Every decision people make as a couple becomes a new marriage.  We are constantly learning from each other.

What is our most recent marriage?  Cleaning out the extra room in our basement so that we do NOT have to rent a storage unit. We have been working on this DAILY after the children go to bed since last Sunday night. Our entire weekend will be committed to this. Matt and I usually work together pretty well, but this one is a doozy! We have different ways of completing this task playing out in our heads.  But alas, we will be just fine.  I think we have this whole marriage thing down.

I do have to say, I feel for hoarders. I am a thrower and the amount of "stuff" I have accumulated is ridiculous! I can see where they end up the way they do...

Like Mother, Like Son

 This is Me

This is Cooper

Cooper and I share more than physical similarities. He is my clone. Cooper often exclaims, "I am SO my mother's child!" and Matt is often seen shaking his head back and forth with that look of, "how can I deal with TWO of them?!".

We visited my Papa Joe a few weekends ago and Cooper saw the picture of me you see above and said, "That's me! WAIT, that can't be me!".  He nervously chuckled when I said it was me.  Then Collin came over and so we pointed to several pictures asking him, "who is that?". He answered them all correctly, "Uncle Jim!, Papa!, Chickie!" and then we pointed to the infamous picture of me and he said, "Pooper! hmmm, Pooper?". Case closed.

Having my own children has helped me learn about myself. What my temperament is, how I handle situations, what I think about and why. My children have especially helped me to ACCEPT and OWN who I am. This, I feel, has helped me relate better to not only my own children, but the children I see everyday, my family, and even my friends. 

I have mentioned before that I have always had obsessive compulsive tendencies. The most famous example was how I would draw 20 or more boats until they met my standards.  Then I would move on to houses, etc. Cooper has never shown much interest in drawing or art and even though my children can be  ANYTHING they want to be with my full support, it has secretly broken my heart. Drawing is all I ever knew. It was all I ever knew HOW to do. I didn't know how to play. Well, Cooper drew 15 turkeys last night and refused to stop until they were complete. It made me smile. What made me smile even more? Hearing Cooper PLAY. He was role-playing using his lego creations, using a story line and different voices.

I hope this means Cooper has learned that:

1. You always finish what you set out to do

2. To loosen up, have fun, and PLAY

I passed down #1 and Cooper is passing UP #2.

P.S. Cooper took his turkey drawing a step further than I used to. He thought of people he wants to mail them to. Watch your mailboxes..there are 10 lucky recipients!